February 2024

     Anytime in my life when I was faced with a tough decision or going through a trying time, my wife Richella would ask me, “Have you prayed about it”?  I would say yes, I have.  She would then ask me, “What is God telling you?"  My response was always the same.  “I don’t know how to hear from God."  Looking back, two other people that were very influential in my spiritual journey, my mom and my aunt, would often talk about hearing from God.  Honestly, I thought they were all either crazy or just weird or that maybe I was missing something important in my life.  

     Ever since my spiritual transformation over the course of about the last year, I can now say that I do know how to hear from God.  Because I want to.  Because I am intentional about hearing from Him through reading and studying His word.  I guess I just expected prior to this that some magical words would come down from the sky.  I have learned that if I am not reading scripture, or not paying attention at mass, and if I am not living life intentionally focusing on God and his word, of course I’ll never hear from him.  It is sort of like when you are in the market for or just purchased a new vehicle.  You never noticed the make and model on the streets as much as you do afterwards.  Suddenly you are seeing that Buick Enclave everywhere!  If I want to hear from God, I must be intentional in my focus on prayer, reading devotionals, listening to and reading spiritual messages and reading scripture.  

     My life prior to my spiritual transformation was much different.  Our marriage was much different.  The most important thing to me was my career.  I do not believe there is anything wrong with career ambition.  But I now realize I was chasing success and status at the expense of my marriage and my relationship with God.  I now understand that when I put God and my marriage first, everything else becomes much easier and I am much happier.  I pray my transformation is an example for my two amazing adult sons in understanding what is important in life as they along with their wives raise our five beautiful grandkids. 

     I referenced my spiritual transformation.  While I believe I have always been a spiritual person, and I guess I have been on a spiritual journey my entire life, my spiritual transformation occurred just recently. Sometimes I think of it as an awakening.  I do not know if I should call it a transformation or awakening, or something else.  “But I do know this: I was blind, and now I can see.” John 9:25.   

     So when did I begin to see a little clearer?  It all started when Richella and I for the first time began to participate in religious activities together, beyond just weekly mass attendance.  We attended and were table facilitators at several Alpha courses in 2019 through 2021.  Sharing personal feelings about anything, especially my religious beliefs, is something I would never have done in the past. The small group discussions at Alpha brought out feelings I never expressed publicly about my faith. 
Richella and I began to attend bible studies together and participated in the parish’s Married Night Out events.  I joined the Knights of Columbus in 2022.  In general, we both began to be more actively involved at Saint Catherine during this time.  I began to see much clearer as I felt like, for the first time in my life, I was truly starting to have a relationship with Jesus.   

     My vision became very clear in July of 2023 when I attended the ACTS retreat.  I saw the impact it had on Richella when she attended the previous women’s ACTS retreat.  I wanted to experience that joy for myself. I am not shy about or hesitant in saying to everyone I talk to that the ACTS retreat was life changing for me.  Using the the words “life changing” is not an overstatement.  I now have a fire within me for the Lord that I cannot even describe.  It was so meaningful to me that I jumped at the chance to become a team leader for the following ACTS retreat that took place in September of last year.

     Richella and I pray together daily, we do at home bible studies and devotionals together, and we recently started attending the weekly Rescue Project at SCS together. We're both Eucharistic Ministers and regularly attend ongoing ACTS meetings and other SCS events.  I love attending That Man is You on Friday mornings to engage in meaningful discussions with other men on their spiritual journey. Whether Richella and I are attending these events together or separately, it has enhanced our relationship. Our spiritual life together has not only changed me, but it has also changed our marriage.  We are closer today than we ever have been in our 41 years of marriage. And I know that’s because we are both closer to the Lord.   

     One of the real awakenings for me recently has been understanding the difference in praying for what I want versus praying for God’s will.  When I made this change in how I pray, the course of how I was to live my life became very clear.  The only way I know how to hear from God and to discern His will is to be intentional in daily prayer and scripture reading.  And to keep Him first in all I do.  I was blind, but now I see.